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A little track family
W wasn’t so sure if she wanted to join track this season. She had reasons. I think the biggest reason was the one she didn’t bring up when we all sat down at dinner and talked about it. J and I had gone to the first practice that afternoon, but W had decided to stay home. I told her that everyone had asked me where she was, and told everyone that she was still thinking about coming out. “I don’t know, I’m busy,” she said. “And I really liked XC. Track just isn’t the same.” (This is coming from the girl who has never tried track before). “You can do both,”…
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The 10K Gamble and Learning to Trust J
The Fargo Marathon is a pretty big deal around here. It’s a Boston Qualifier, and a really appealing one at that (Fargo is a really REALLY flat course and the weather is usually decent). There are races all week long for whatever floats your boat: dog runs, kid runs, the 5K and then marathon day which includes the 10K, half marathon, marathon relay, and marathon. The city gets really into it. The neighbourhoods do too–live bands play music to help rally the runners, people bring out orange slices to you, there are posters everywhere and hundreds of perfect strangers are cheering you on. It’s a really cool experience. This year my…
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Making Peace with Mother’s Day
Steve and I were rather young when we started our family. There were lots of reasons that contributed to our desire to have kids. The idea of a brand new person made from a little bit of you and a little bit of the person you love more than anything else on the planet is just–well, a rather romantic thing. And since those babies would be made by us (who, of course, were pretty incredible people), then our babies would turn out to be the most incredible humans to contribute to society. Because baby making utilizes only the best genetics, fetal development always goes smoothly, and well educated parents, pretty much guarantees a perfect little human.…
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Let’s talk behaviours
J got sent home for behaviours on Thursday. For those of you keeping track, yes, J has been sent home twice in two weeks for behaviour at school. So let’s talk behaviours–since this is part and parcel with autism. I think the term “behaviours” is such a funny term to use with kids on the spectrum. I remember one time in elementary school J announcing at the dinner table that he had a behaviour at school and he seemed almost confused by it. “Behaviours” in autism speak means any (or a combination) of the following: scratching, kicking, biting, hitting, pushing, shoving, destruction to someone’s property, destruction to oneself, etc–a euphemism for bad…
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Long term caregiving
Between the J’s dentist appointment on Wednesday, J’s doctor’s appointment on Thursday, J being sent home for behavioural issues on Monday, and W staying home from school on Wednesday and still feeling crummy Thursday and me getting strep somewhere in the wee hours of Sunday morning, I’ve been thinking a lot about long term care giving, the stresses it brings, and how people respond to you when you’re a long term care giver. J’s dentist appointment was above average–not great–but above average. I was expecting a superbly perfect dentist appointment like the one a few weeks ago, but this time J started sobbing in the middle of it. Thankfully he wasn’t kicking,…
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Knowing how much to push
All week, J’s been really sick. I don’t know what it’s like for other kids with autism, but when J gets sick, it never knocks him out. When most of us just want to veg out and watch movies and sleep all day and check out when we get a sore throat, runny nose, and a cough that just won’t stop, J will still wake up at 6 am, still wander around the house looking for things to do, still want to be entertained, all while still feeling miserable. It’s really, really strange. Not even illness can seem to knock down autism and all of its obsessions, habits, and idiosyncrasies. In…
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Without the song and dance
I’m not going to lie. I’m sort of loving the fact that my kids are out of the whole “Holiday Spectacular” phase. When my kids were littles, I thought that I’d be heartbroken when the Santa Claus, Easter Bunny, Leprechaun phase (okay, maybe not the Leprechaun thing–I still don’t quite get why that’s such a big deal here, it wasn’t anything I grew up with) was over. But I’m not heart broken at all. In fact, I have this overwhelming sense of relief. Not to say that holidays aren’t still stressful for me. They are. But reduced amounts of holiday fanfare are helpful. I think it’s because I feel like…
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One year later
One year later and here we are again, the first track meet of the season! I was a hot, anxious mess at last year’s first meet. We had tried in every single way to prepare J for his first race. From the sound of the gun, to practicing a few times on the track, to schedule strategies we had thought of everything. And still, I wasn’t sure we were going to make it through that first track meet. J was a ball of anxiety himself that first meet. And not everything went exactly as planned (the gun didn’t go off TWICE!). But J made it. He ran the entire race,…
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The French onion soup incident
I should have seen it coming. It’s been in the making for weeks now. We’ve hit that funky winter twilight period here in Fargo–where winter just wants to hang on and not let go and you’re tired of the snow and rain and you just want some frigging sunshine already. Because you’re sick of it being dark by five (although with daylight savings and the tilt of the planet have made for more sunlight this past month) and you don’t want to run one more day out in the cold, snow, sleet or rain (which finally let up this week). You’re sick of kid’s homework (waiting for your daughter to…
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Some are born great
This week has been W’s week. W was “crowned” student of the week at her middle school (not really crowned–just a free t-shirt and vouchers for Buffalo Wild Wings), performed in a select orchestra concert Thursday night, and received 1st place in the music composition category in the PTA Reflections contest (again). A trifecta of achievement. The line from Shakespeare’s play Twelfth Night came to my mind this week as we bustled through all of W’s events: “Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them.” In some ways W falls under all three categories. I’ve always felt like she’s been my miracle baby since day…
