home strategies

  • anxiety,  home strategies

    What we remember (and how we teach our children about the world)

    Bringing J to an awareness of the world–especially grown up things always makes me a little nervous. J’s brain is a steel trap for memories–especially memories that carry any pain or anxiety. J remembers things like back when he was in grade two, where the lunch ladies burnt the school pizza and set off the fire alarm while he was at gym, causing a (minor) evacuation. That was the 89th day of school and he won’t let that go. And every year since we hold our breath, cross our fingers, and go through all sorts of rituals to make it through the day when the 89th day of school rolls through. There’s a myriad…

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  • anxiety,  home strategies

    That Time at the Dentist

    Thursday we took the whole family to the dentist and it was hard. Really hard. But not necessarily in the way you might think. J had the first appointment. We did this because we knew this was going to be hard. But we also knew that J had been a few times before, and we know that with J, the more times he does something, the better he’ll do. He’s been to a few cleanings before. He never makes it to the end, but usually the hygienist can get a little something done before he squirms to much or takes a full on anxiety attack. Thursday went okay–at least us…

  • home strategies

    The Standard Procedures of Getting Dressed

    For weeks I’ve been trying to figure out how to teach J to pay more attention when getting dressed. Too many mornings he’ll come down with his shirt inside out. Workout shorts on backwards. He always has one sock on the right way and one on upside down. Our camping trip to Banff and Jasper was really the last straw for me on this. He would dress in the tent only to come out looking like a mismatched hobo (to be fair we were wearing grungy camping clothes). It was such a pain to have him go back in the tent to “fix it.” Or worse, his left sock would be…

  • family,  home strategies,  milestones

    Rites of Passage, Milestones, and Lawnmowers

    I have a love hate relationship with rites of passage and milestones. Most of the time I hate them. They remind me of how “behind” J is, or how he’s just not like every other kid his age. I remember going to playgroups watching some babies walk and talk at ten months, their mothers proudly boasting their prodigy child’s accomplishments and then going home thinking, “My baby’s smart too. I know it. He’s just not doing those things right now.” Milestones, physical abilities, rites of passage. They’re all really big things. Some parents hold their children back in school so their kids can have an almost full year advantage over…

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